Countdown: 1 day

Feeling
Exhausted! I went wakeboarding for the first time today and my arms are aching and feels so sore. I am so unfit. Anyway, it felt good that the wind was blowing in my face/ hair. It felt nice. I felt all "woman" and sexy. However sometimes, the hair flew into my face and stung my skin - so in a way, I'm glad that it's going. See, my subconscious mind is making up excuses again. Ha! Ha!

Pictures

Countdown: 2 days

Feeling
A little frustrated, by the number of people that have asked me to think twice, thrice about shaving my head. Everyone except myself seems to be more afraid of what I will be doing! Not much fear today. Quite eager to shave. Feel a little sien (demoralised) because almost everyone is asking me not to do it. It's not like my hair will never grow again... I'll still do it but all these negativity is just dampening.

Pictures

My father called me and asked "Are you really going to shave your head?" to which I replied "Yes, I will". He then told me about his cousin whose couple friends had also shaved their heads for the same event last year. They had lots of glares and stares (even people looking from the corner of their eye), all trying to look at them and understand why they may be bald.

I cut my father off and said, "Hiyah, Pa! It's to be expected what. I am sure a lot of people are going to stare at me and I am aware of it". He also said that his cousin mentioned that there are many ways in supporting charitable organizations and shaving one's head bald is probably not the best option.

The funny thing is that it's not just my father who's trying to ask me not to shave my head bald but my friends and colleagues too!

Well I really appreciate people showing their concern and I know that they love me and worry for me but perhaps... it's my choice? Please be reminded that I'm under no pressure or obligation to do this. I just want to do this. It's just... my way of showing support. Some people would rather donate money but I don't like giving out money. Instead, I give emotional and physical support just like how I regularly donate my blood.

Pa if you're reading this, I'm not angry. Just don't worry for me okay? I know, you love me and want the best for me and I love you too!

Countdown: 3 days

Feeling
Rather neutral with occasional bouts of nervousness. Very excited, can't wait for the actual day. I don't know if it's my subconscious mind making up excuses but I would like my hair shaved off for the following reasons:

- it's been very hot lately and the baldness will give me a feeling of cool (I hope)
- My fringe is neither long nor short so it keeps getting into my face and irritates me
- I think I'm balding because a handful of hair drops whenever I wash it

Pictures

Wig

The whole HR department brought me out for lunch today. The purpose: to buy me a wig! 2 of my colleagues wanted to buy me a wig each. One long, one short. We took a taxi from Raffles Place to City Plaza (a quiet neighbourhood shopping centre) and my boss paid the taxi fare.

We went to this little shop called Sinma that had quite a variety of wigs. I tried on a few - short hair, bob hair and long hair. The short one looked weird on me. Even the Promoter told me that I looked too old for my age with the short hairstyle.

So I tried on a bob hair one. It was quite nice. It looked natural. I liked the design a lot but the colour was light brown (like hazel) and I wasn't used to light coloured hair. I have never dyed my hair since I was born and have always had jet black hair. So I tried on another where the colour was darker. Oh, the colour was nice. But I didn't like the hairstyle. It was ugly.

I then tried on some long haired wigs. They looked fake. One could tell at a glance that I was wearing a wig. Probably because the length of the hair made the wig heavy and didn't seem natural.

So it was only down to two wigs. The one with the nice design but not so nice colour or the one with the nice colour but awful design. I guess the choice is obvious. I picked the light coloured wig with the wonderful design. One of my colleagues shared my opinion but my other colleague and boss actually thought I looked nice in the wig that I picked.

Well I wouldn't be looking at myself so I guess if they're right then it's safe to get it. As we only ended up buying one wig, both my colleagues shared and paid for it. I am so touched.

We then went for lunch at Happy Restaurant where my boss paid. It was yummy. There was a buffet dessert/ salad/ soup/ fruit spread that came with each main course. I think it was quite worth the price.

Taking the cab from City Plaza back to the office, my boss paid again. How wonderful. I got a free lunch, free transport and a sponsored wig for my courageous act. hehe Perhaps I should make this a yearly affair...

2 Birds with 1 Stone

Today, one of my colleagues told me about a Locks of Love organization. It is a non-profit organization which collects hair from donors, that they make into wigs for financially disabled patients suffering hair loss from any kind of medical treatment, based in Florida, US.

I attach below, guidelines from their website. If my hair is long enough, I’ll ask that it be cut according to the guidelines so I can send in my hair for another good cause.

NO Turning Back

Up until now, I had been wanting to shave my head but kept having doubts so I decided to send a mass email to all my office colleagues which will prevent me from backing out. Here's the letter that I sent out:

Hello all,
In support of the Children's Cancer Foundation Sam and I are going to take symbolic action and sacrifice our locks to raise awareness of childhood cancer in Singapore.

Sam will be doing it on Thursday evening just before his last day of work here in SIO on Friday, 29th June. I, on the other hand will be doing it publicly at Novena Square on Sunday, 1st July.

Please show your support, either through monetary pledges, which will help the Foundation improve the quality of life for the children and their families, or by JOINING US! and help give the plight of child cancer a louder voice!

Many thanks to all!

Regards,
Sam & Yen Yi

I found a Shaving Friend

I was in the pantry getting some drinks and told a colleague about my desire to go bald and he said that he was going to do it too! Yay... So I won't be doing it alone.

Not that we're gonna be doing it together, side-by-side anyway. He's going to shave his head on Thursday evening as his last day of work here (he's a colleague from the States) is Friday whereas I will be doing it publicly at Novena Square.

If anyone of you reading this is interested to come and look at me, please do so. The event starts at 12 p.m. so I suggest you reach around that time.

See ya there!

Doubts

I told a few of my colleagues about my plan in shaving my head next Sunday. Many of them were very supportive. However, a handful of them were strongly against the idea and they tried to talk me out of it. I'm not one with a weak mind but I did have my doubts. I felt scared.

I suppose, it's like whenever I go to the http://www.hsa.gov.sg/html/consumer/donorcare.html for a blood donation, I get nervously scared no matter how many times I've done it. The fear is always there. What happens if the needle breaks? What happens if they can't find my vein? What happens if I bruise? What happens if I catch a disease from a non-sterile needle?

So I started to wonder if I should go ahead with the depilation. I called my boyfriend and spoke to him. He was very supportive. He promised that he wouldn't leave me if I went bald. Even if the hair didn't grow back, he would still love and stay with me. Aww... that's mushy but sweet, isn't it?

Call me a chicken but I guess it's ordinary to have such feelings when one is about to go skin-head, especially for a woman. For a guy, it's normal. It even looks good on some guys. I love the actor Billy Zane bald. He looks so much more handsome when he's bald compared to with hair.

ps/ If it's so difficult for me to shave my head willingly, I wonder just how tough it is for a cancer patient who has hers done unwillingly. I don't think I would ever understand...

I think I'm gonna DO IT

I saw my boss this morning and she told me, "I think you should do it. It's a good idea. With your charitable action, we could encourage donation and get the company to match the amount collected". I was rather surprised that she was so supportive.

My company has got a Gift Match program where if any associate makes a donation to a charitable organization and it meets the necessary requirements - the company will then make a 2 for 1 donation to the same charitable organization. For example, if I donate S$100 to the Children's Cancer Foundation (CCF), the company will then make an extra S$200 donation to CCF.

I didn't even think about that but what my boss mentioned was excellent. Not only would I be lending moral support to children with cancer, they would also benefit from my colleagues' (& company's) monetary donations. This is good. I am so gonna shave my hair off!

Tell Her

I actually found out about Hair For Hope (HFH) last year around the same time but decided not to participate as I had just started work as a Human Resource Associate. I was new to the company and I didn't think that it was appropriate to go around my daily duties bald headed. So I dropped the idea.

This year, I decided to do it. However, I felt that it was only right that I informed my boss before I jumped into it as my actions as a HR Associate, will reflect upon the entire HR department. There are no restrictions about being bald but if in any case, it violated any HR guidelines, I would be bringing the whole department down with me.

So I was briefly talking to my boss after work, about the skies, the weather, the sun etc. Then I casually mentioned "what would you think if I shaved my head in support of Hair For Hope?" My boss gave me an empty look and was dumbfounded. She was too shock to say anything. She then asked me to think about it before I made my decision.

I was rather dampened. But all is not lost. She would talk about it to me tomorrow so I went home, seriously thinking long and hard about actually shaving my hair - every single one - off.

Children's Cancer Foundation

This year, the Children's Cancer Foundation will be hosting the Hair For Hope program (HFH) on 1st July, Sunday at 12 p.m. in Velocity@Novena Square. The online registration had closed so I have to walk-in on that day itself to get my hair shaved.

HFH was incepted in 2003 by 9 volunteers who decided to shave their heads as a symbolic gesture to help create awareness for children's cancer in Singapore. Every year after that, there has been a remarkable increase in the number of shavees which has shown their support to the kids.

A total of 164 ladies have sacrificed their crowning glories. In 2004, there were 12 ladies. The following year, there were 22 ladies. Just last year alone, there were 130 ladies who went skin-head. It's really touching to see that more women are coming out and going bald for the cause of charity.

This year, I will be one of them and I'm already proud of it.

This Blog

This blog was created so I can post about my journey from when I had long, flowing, soft black hair to after it is all shaved off and my experiences as a bald person. I hope to create awareness with this blog. I also hope that the general public will almost understand that it is not easy to be bald and to show some respect when they meet one. To not stare at the person and make her/ him feel uncomfortable. That is what I am aiming to achieve with my symbolic gesture of going skin-head.

About Me

I am born in the year 1980, in what the Chinese believes is the year of the Monkey. Just like the animal itself, I am very mischievous. What makes it worse is that I'm also an Arien, people who are generally cheeky and naughty, but with a good heart. Generally, I am all of that. I am also very bold and sometimes too daring.

Whenever possible, I try to offer help. However I strongly disagree with monetary help. I've seen people without hands who can earn a decent living, the blind who can support themselves. Even old grannies working away to make a living. That is why I hardly (alright, sometimes the softer side of me kicks in and I donate, only a little) donate any money to beggars.

That said, I am very generous in many other ways. I am a regular blood donor. I believe that you could never buy such things even if you had all the money in the world. Blood is so vital to a dying person. Did you know that one person's donation may be able to save two lives? Yeah, that's if you donate 450cc of blood.

My Mum died when I was only 8. She succumbed to cancer of the stomach when she was only 39. Since then, I have always hated cancer. It is my number one enemy. Many years later, my grandmother too died of cancer – of the lungs. It's weird how she has never smoked a cigarette in her life!

I have always been around people with cancer therefore I would say that I am “experience” in the sense that I am no stranger to what it is. How someone actually feels with cancer, that – I will never know. However, I would do and help all I can to overcome and hopefully wipe out this darned disease.

There's an organization in Singapore called the Children's Cancer Foundation. They are here to help children with cancer and their families cope with the burden of the damned disease. They are an independent non-profit organization. As I had mentioned earlier, I would not donate money. I would, however – sacrifice my hair.

The Children's Cancer Foundation holds an annual Hair For Hope program. Through this program, members of the public are invited to shave their heads. Through this symbolic gesture, they aim to:

• Tell every child with cancer and their their families that they are not alone in the fight

• To lend moral support to all children with cancer, and to let them know that there is nothing wrong with being bald

• Help raise funds for Children’s Cancer Foundation through monetary pledges, to aid the Foundation in improving the quality of lives of our children and their families.

• Create awareness of childhood cancer in SingaporeI want to do it.

I want to help these children. I don't know if my actions will mean much to them but if it does, it is worth the sacrifice. After all, my hair will grow back in due time, wouldn't it?